A Final Goodbye

I finally did it. I finally said goodbye to the past after accepting that this was it and I was wrong about all I'd thought and felt.

Now to keep doing awesome stuff.

One of these mornings

A Promise

I shan't ever look for you again in my dreams.

Now you're just somebody that I used to know

There is a song bouncing off the walls at the moment by Gotye called Somebody that I used to know. My need to listen to it over and over again comes late at night at that time when it takes clenching teeth to keep my eyes open.

I was sitting at my work desk on the 22nd of September wondering what I'd forgotten to do. Did I miss someone's birthday? Did I have an appointment for a pedi or a massage? Was there a bill due?

I forgot it again. Even after toughening myself up a couple of weeks in advance for what would have been my fifth wedding anniversary or our 14th year together, I still forgot.

Right now, that seems to be a good thing but I can't lie. When I did remember, it ached. Ached through my entire body. Skin, organs, limbs and the split ends lying on the floor of my hairdresser's floor.

There may always be a pain there... where he used to be. Even now he's just somebody that I used to know.

Back to Black

I hope there is no more pain now.

Bye bye, Ms Amy.

Closure

Today was one of those perfect Sydney summer days. Up early and with all my chores done by midday, I spent a few hours chilling on the couch and taking in the peace around me.

Fingers crossed, I'll be starting a new job soon and the next chapter of life starts. It's time for it. I'm excited and happy. This is the way I want life to be.

Goodbye to some things and hello to new ones. Goodbye to old friends and hello to new ones.

Life is pretty awesome.

I'm leaving Sydney

I went to look for a picture in iPhoto that would sum up Sydney and there wasn't just one. I guess this blog is the total of it. The happiness, the pain and all the wonderful friends. It's been a beautiful time in my life and one I've used to grow in to who I think I really am.

What you hear is true, I'm leaving Sydney to return home to Darwin.

This was not as hard a decision as I thought. Sydney is not the same as it once was for me. There are many reasons to stay but many many more to go.

To say I will miss you, doesn't really express it enough. I hope you keep reading this blog and find my life just as dramatic and interesting and mundane as ever :)

I'll be around until the end of October.