Friday, 29 January 2010
Administer oxygen to yourself first, before helping others
Someone once told me that I put too much of my self-value in to what others think of me.
It's so true. I've been judging myself by what people around me say and do in response to me. Constantly seeking their approval by giving them what they need and forgiving every transgression. Always putting myself after them.
Today, that ended. I had two amazing mentors in 2009, Ines and Lindsay. What they taught me is what I am implementing in my life today. Instead of doing everything I can to win the approval of those around me, I am going to aim to be a good person and no longer be controlled by the disapproval of others. Anyone who harshes my mellow is out of my life.
I will no longer bow to the whims of people who I value highly. They wouldn't be asking that of me if they valued me too.
Another person said that you should look after yourself first. I've said that before but I don't mean it the way it is mostly interpreted. What I mean is similar to what they say on a plane, put your oxygen mask on before attending to anyone else. Love and respect yourself before focusing on anyone else. That does not mean you put yourself first and not care for others. That's so not what it means.
Selfish people will take anything and twist it to suit themselves. It is much harder to have ideals and honour them even when it means changing tack and admitting you are wrong. Correcting your mistakes as you travel the road. To stick to your ideals as if they are a hard set of rules is an excuse to tread on heads and hearts and blame your beliefs rather than be true to your beliefs and allowing them to grow.
I was wrong. I will learn from that and move forward.