Sunday 31 January 2010
Today was a day of ultimate achievement for me.
I went out and saw three friends, at separate events: One from primary school; One from high school; And a new friend. It was a nice day, spent with people who have given me a chance to find my feet. Thank you.
As for those who didn't wait, you lost a loyal and fun friend. Too bad.
Friday 29 January 2010
Someone once told me that I put too much of my self-value in to what others think of me.
It's so true. I've been judging myself by what people around me say and do in response to me. Constantly seeking their approval by giving them what they need and forgiving every transgression. Always putting myself after them.
Today, that ended. I had two amazing mentors in 2009, Ines and Lindsay. What they taught me is what I am implementing in my life today. Instead of doing everything I can to win the approval of those around me, I am going to aim to be a good person and no longer be controlled by the disapproval of others. Anyone who harshes my mellow is out of my life.
I will no longer bow to the whims of people who I value highly. They wouldn't be asking that of me if they valued me too.
Another person said that you should look after yourself first. I've said that before but I don't mean it the way it is mostly interpreted. What I mean is similar to what they say on a plane, put your oxygen mask on before attending to anyone else. Love and respect yourself before focusing on anyone else. That does not mean you put yourself first and not care for others. That's so not what it means.
Selfish people will take anything and twist it to suit themselves. It is much harder to have ideals and honour them even when it means changing tack and admitting you are wrong. Correcting your mistakes as you travel the road. To stick to your ideals as if they are a hard set of rules is an excuse to tread on heads and hearts and blame your beliefs rather than be true to your beliefs and allowing them to grow.
I was wrong. I will learn from that and move forward.
Monday 25 January 2010
Saturday 23 January 2010
“Whoever you are, there is some younger person who thinks you are perfect. There is some work that will never be done if you don’t do it. There is someone who would miss you if you were gone. There is a place that you alone can fill.”
- Jacob M. Braude
- Jacob M. Braude
Wednesday 20 January 2010
Sunday 17 January 2010
Not surprisingly, people come to me these days to talk about how sucky love is.
The thing is that it does actually surprise me when it happens. This is because I do not think that, about love and relationships. Yes, my major life relationship was a Hiroshima level tragedy. Kafka could not have written it better. This doesn't mean that I think love is a bad thing with a predictable disastrous outcome.
The truth is that although I have been torched, my feelings are that life is wonderful. People are wonderful. Love is wonderful.
Personally, I won't go near the damn thing until I am happy with who I am and at peace in my life. You have to be happy about yourself before anyone else can share your life. When I'm in a better place, I'll take a chance again.
You should too. There are too many positive things about good friendships that mean you should try again, even if you may get heartbroken for a while.
Just don't date my ex. He's a bastard :)
Friday 15 January 2010
“Sometimes in life there really are bonds formed that can never be broken. Sometimes you really can find that one person who will stand by you no matter what. Maybe you’ll find it in a spouse and celebrate it with your dream wedding, but there’s also the chance that the one person you can count on for a lifetime, the one person who knows you sometimes better than you know yourself is the same person who’s been standing beside you all along.”
- Bride Wars